Fortune Telling and Get to Know You Games

On Sunday, Mark (the only other American at my university and thus the guy I'm confused for all the time - we all look the same) and I were invited to dinner by a trio of giggly girls. This is one of two groups in my conversation class who behave like thirteen year old teeny boppers. Besides being in their thirties, I guess this isn't out of the ordinary.

Sevda invited us to her house for dinner with her and her husband, and sisters Selma and Gushen helped prepare the meal. I know these names for a specific reason.

The week before, Sevda had invited me to lunch with her and the two sisters. While in the car, I discovered that all three girls loved LOST, and we compared favorite characters (Jack - don't make me BARF) before Sevda said, "The ending, it was not - suitable." When I tried to share how I felt about it, she cut me off with. "It was bad."

Anyway, while I was chewing my kebab at lunch, Sevda leaned across the table and said, "What is my name?" I heard her but acted like I didn't understand. I was stalling, because I had no idea. She knew my game immediately, and tried a different question. "What's her name?" she said, pointing at Gushen. I had to shrug. At that point I knew she was going to ask about Selma, too, whose name at the time I had no idea about, and there was nothing I could do to stop her. It was excruciating, until one of them accidentally called me Mark.

After dinner on Sunday (where Sevda dumped, no lie, half a pan of fried anchovies on my plate and told me not to worry about the bones), we sat in the most ordinary Turkish living room I've seen yet and had Turkish coffee. This stuff is thick, like one of those disgusting health smoothies, and leaves dredges that you're supposed to be able to read fortunes from. Like tea leaves, if tea leaves looked like the throw up of a dog that ate a black rubber bone.

Sevda took my cup and sat across from me. Eventually she started telling my fortune, with the sisters helping at certain points. It started out tame (you miss your family, you will have visitors soon, you will know fear - that last one was in a demon voice), but as it went on - and it went on for a good fifteen minutes - she started to get bolder and bolder. It became a Turkish version of MASH, that childhood game that told you where you would live and who you would marry. It turns out I'll get married in Greece in five years, before studying French in Paris. I don't want to bore you with the details, but I will say that I am psyched about retirement - ON THE MOON! I tipped her two lira to predict that last one.